she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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