Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
