4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
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