At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
The feeling are messing with the penis
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
