i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
He shit in the fireplace
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
