Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
