Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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