You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
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so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
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He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
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