Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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