You work out of a Hotel?
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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