I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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