Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
