Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
