yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
