she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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