Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
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