He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
