I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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