Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
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