I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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