god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Randomize