Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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