Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
