plz talk dirty to me
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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