READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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