normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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