I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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