Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Everyone says I win the strip club
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
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