he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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