Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
