Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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