He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
