im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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