You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
