belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
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