Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
