For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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