I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
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