problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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