Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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