But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
now i know why i became what i already was.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
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