on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
