what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Randomize
