I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
