He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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