So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
