How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
