i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
