Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
