so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize
