Texts From Last Night

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  (305): View more from Florida

  Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.

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  (305): Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain. http://tfl.nu/9uzx
  Replies (30) Good night (3335) Bad night (611)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.

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  (804): names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving. http://tfl.nu/d6qb
  Replies (8) Good night (3638) Bad night (547)
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  (818): View more from California

  I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.

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  (818): I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot. http://tfl.nu/6tih
  Replies (5) Good night (5775) Bad night (1506)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.

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  (509): We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade. http://tfl.nu/xjtk
  Replies (6) Good night (4462) Bad night (921)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.

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  (616): No flamethrowers. That is a direct order. http://tfl.nu/o0tj
  Replies (7) Good night (3308) Bad night (933)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table

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  (206): I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table http://tfl.nu/jkfk
  Replies (5) Good night (2479) Bad night (1149)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.

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  (740): I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing. http://tfl.nu/h581
  Replies (10) Good night (2402) Bad night (794)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.

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  (202): Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation. http://tfl.nu/g1cn
  Replies (9) Good night (1125) Bad night (611)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.

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  (506): Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies. http://tfl.nu/zmgn
  Replies (2) Good night (1468) Bad night (523)
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  (914): View more from New York

  ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore

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  (914): ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore http://tfl.nu/u5mc
  Replies (10) Good night (1471) Bad night (603)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?

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  (706): It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from? http://tfl.nu/d0ez
  Replies (7) Good night (1248) Bad night (406)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  Drinking loves me for WHO I am

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  (905): Drinking loves me for WHO I am http://tfl.nu/nlm7
  Replies (3) Good night (1217) Bad night (402)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.

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  (210): Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married. http://tfl.nu/tr6n
  Replies (13) Good night (1055) Bad night (630)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.

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  (336): You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that. http://tfl.nu/r9t5
  Replies (7) Good night (634) Bad night (432)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?

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  (717): there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right? http://tfl.nu/jd9g
  Replies (2) Good night (812) Bad night (337)

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